7 Alternative New Years Resolutions

Did you know that most New Year Resolutions fail by the end of the month? In this blog I share with you an alternative approach that helps you set achievable goals for sustainable long-term change and happiness.

For several years now I have moved away from the idea of setting challenging New Year Resolutions or having a plan to completely overhaul my life. Firstly because January is still mid-winter, a time for resting, visioning and going slowly. Secondly, because these sorts of goals are not only unrealistic but also come from a place of self-criticism and punishment.

Most of the goals we set are ones that urge us to do more, be more, achieve more. It’s about pushing ourselves harder rather than listening to our needs and desires. This is why most New Year Resolutions have failed before the end of the month.

This January I invite you to give yourself to have a soft start to the year, we are in mid-winter after all. Rather than pushing, honour where you are with your energy, your needs and your desire and set some intentions for the year that come from self-love. 

I recommend taking some time to connect inwards and get a sense of what your heartfelt, soulful needs and desires are. This will give you a better sense of what your version of a good life, success and happiness are and help you set more achievable and fulfilling goals for the year.

Here are seven resolutions I am following that I think you’ll enjoy

1. Get more sleep - Or at least get more rest. We are in the heart of winter when most of nature shuts down to some degree. This is not the time to try and be a superhero firing on all cylinders. Instead, rest more, dream more, connect inwards where you can get insight into what really brings you joy. In cycle awareness Winter relates to the bleed which is where are meant to take rest, so if you are cycling, take extra care around this at this time of year. 

Suggestion: create a bedtime routine that helps you wind down and sets up a good nights sleep

2. Focus on pleasure rather than productivity - There’s nothing like the feeling of having a list of things you have to do and deadlines to suck the joy out of tasks. There is a weightiness to the idea of ‘having to do ….’ something. Instead try to focus on what you find enjoyable and put energy into that. Cultivate a sense of ‘yay, I get to do…’ When you are not at work, are having some down time notice your thinking about how you spend that time. Are you feeling guilty about being 'unproductive' or that you need to achieve something useful or notable that day. What if a day doing exactly what you feel like is the most useful thing you could do?

Suggestion: Do the tasks that light you up most first, it might help shift your overall mindset or mood.

3. Have at least 10 laughs a day - This was recommended a couple of years ago by my daughter, when I asked her what would be a good resolution. I had to include it not only because it is so good for our health, but also because she made me laugh so much in her explanation. “Having 10 laughs a day will make you feel much better and it doesn’t matter even if they’re evil laughs, they still count. Because most mean people are just sad so if they laugh more they’ll be happier and nicer!”

Suggestion: Switch up your podcast or TV shows with some comedy or maybe even book a night at a comedy club.

4. Love your food, take time to enjoy it - no punishing new year strict diets! Allow yourself to take real pleasure from food. Take time to cook good meals, share them with friends or family. Take time eating them and enjoy every morsel. When we start to disentangle ourselves from the guilt, judgement, restriction vs reward, calorie counting, comfort eating, mental cycles we can get caught in we have the chance to connect to our body’s needs and real appetite rather than our thought and beliefs around what we should or shouldn’t eat. We are more able to give our body what it needs and that in turn brings satisfaction that naturally regulates eating.

Suggestion: look up some delicious seasonal recipes that bring joy as well as nourishment.

5. Allow yourself to have more playtime - I am regularly awed at how my daughter can disappear in to her room and play for hours. She has an ability to find fun in whatever she finds and create whole new worlds and scenarios with her imagination. As adults we are often trained out of that spontaneous, creative flow. We are trained to do something useful or productive and can feel guilty messing around ‘doing nothing much’ or just having unstructured fun. Do you have anything you do ‘just for fun’ that serves no other purpose?

Suggestion: In your downtime try playing family games, cards or give yourself permission to have a creative project for fun.

6. Show up as you are - you are perfect enough - Many of us carry a sense of not being quite ……. enough (you can fill in the gap with whatever resonates, clever, pretty, accomplished, confident etc.) and this can add a lot of stress and anxiety to our day. I caught myself being stressed about an old friend coming to visit because the flat was ‘not tidy enough’. I wanted to make things perfect for her. Then I realised, she really wouldn’t care or judge, she just wants to see me. There are probably many times we make life more difficult than it needs to be due to our insecurities.

Suggestion: Write affirmations that flip the negative thoughts you have about yourself. Stick them in places where you'll see them regularly.

7. Have a regular treatment - Despite our best efforts, life will always throw challenges and having some regular treatment helps us to build the resilience we need to weather storms when they come. Prevention is far better than cure! I have observed in my own life that when I drift away from regular therapy, I invariably end up with a problem to fix which costs more time, energy, money and peace of mind than having a treatment once a month. Whether it’s reflexology or a massage or some other kind of therapeutic session, make sure you prioritise your wellbeing and make life a bit easier for yourself. 

IDEA: Book and pay for monthly sessions in advance as a gift to yourself - then it's in your diary and is a stress-free treat to look forward to!.

Conclusion:

Treat yourself as you would your best friend, be your own cheerleader, wish the best for yourself. Set goals from a place of self-love not self-criticism, ones that nurture your wellbeing and help you grow. Small achievable steps lead to more long term change than big unrealistic goals.

If part of your self-care goals for the year involves reflexology or yoga, I’d love to support you! I specialise in women’s health, pregnancy and post-natal wellbeing and support for those with cancer. It’s easy to book an appointment online or simply get in touch to discuss your needs.